An Apologia of Sorts
by Philip Berrigan

For Susan Crane, Stephen Kelly, S.J., Elizabeth Walz

"Jesus said (to Peter), 'Have faith in God!' Amen I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'be lifted up and thrown into the sea,' and does not doubt in her/his heart, but believes that it will happen, it shall be done..." (Mk 11:21)

Do I believe that "the mountain thrown into the sea" is a metaphor for a disarmed world? Of course, I must believe that. But eroding and weakening that belief is the dark angel of myself and the Siren's Song of an imperial culture. So I struggle and pray and sweat.

I am 76 years old, a married Catholic priest, with 35 years of resistance to the empire's wars, nine years of imprisonment, numberless arrests, surveillance and "dirty tricks" from the FBI. I have a superb wife and partner, Elizabeth McAlister. We have three magnificent children - Frida, Jerry, and Kate - plus a loving community of nay-sayers at Jonah House.

Flowers, trees and birds surround the house that we ourselves built - its loveliness evidence of the lavish hand of God. I have inspiration and support from my three Berrigan brothers - Dan, Jerry and Jim - better nonviolent resisters than myself. (Two were arrested at the School of the Assassins, Ft. Benning, Georgia this past weekend). How do I measure the hundred-fold of Christ? It multiplies geometrically for me.

Enter my friends, some times brusquely: "Hey, Dads!! Give it up to the young pups. It's rocking chair time - time to doze over a checkered career, time to go gracefully to seed!"

But, but, but...

I cannot forget the dying children of Iraq, and the two million dead of our war, sanctions, and depleted uranium. I cannot forget what 78 days of NATO bombing (NATO is a clone of the US) did to Kosovo and Serbia. I cannot forget my shame and sorrow over the second American nuclear war in Iraq, and the third in Yugoslavia. (Despite the spin doctors who control damage, depleted uranium shells and bombs are nuclear weapons). I cannot forget my country's war psychosis - its obsession with better tools for killing, its mammoth war chest, its think tanks and war labs, its sick ambition "to own the weather" as a "force multiplier." I cannot forget that historical moment when Washington abandoned the American people to become the marionette of billionaires, transnational corporations, banks, and deluded lobbyists with deep pockets. Above all, I cannot forget Our Savior turning his face resolutely toward Jerusalem and the Cross. "Whoever wants to come after me, must deny self, pick up the cross and follow me." (Mk 8:34)

I will not forget, and I will not go out to pasture. Instead, I will wrestle for faith with my three brave sisters and brothers. A faith which will hopefully embrace worthiness to suffer for the name of Jesus. (Acts 5:41) As the ballad goes: "For swords into Plowshares, the hammer has to fall." Indeed! Our hammers and blood will fall on this hi-tech monstrosity called the A-10, which fired 95% of the depleted uranium in Iraq and Yugoslavia. A hammer is the universal tool, used to build up and tear down, used to extend responsibility for disarmament universally. Disarming the weapons and abolishing war is the #1 business of the world. Nothing so destroys our relationship with God and one another; nothing so threatens the very survival of the planet.

Blood - the most intense and powerful Biblical symbol - causes two realities in disarmament. First, it reaffirms the covenant with the nonviolent Jesus, a covenant sealed in his blood. Second, it stresses again the prohibition against killing. There will be no justice, no peace, no relief for the poor, no restoration of the ecology until we stop killing one another.

The vision of Isaiah 2:4 tells of a people faithful to God by disarmament and living as sisters and brothers. That is the spirit of God's kin-dom, that is the reality finalized by Jesus' death and resurrection. Let everyone listen, hear, and live. "And I consecrate myself for them, so that they may also be consecrated in truth." (Jn. 17:18)

"Either Jesus was a liar, or war is never necessary!" (Benjamin Salmon)